Transitions: I’m leaving Hong Kong and I don’t know how to feel about it

BY ONEIKA RAYMOND

The title says it all: in four days I leave Hong Kong indefinitely and I’m not too sure how I feel about it.

I mean, I am extremely excited about New York City! But Hong Kong was so nice that I came here to live here twice.

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A curiosity about the East brought me here in 2009, Big Love made me leave two years later in 2011,  and an unabated longing for the city lured me back in 2013.

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Left: at my farewell to Hong Kong dinner in 2011. Right: at my HK farewell party four years later, in 2015. Deja vu…

All told, I spent four years in Hongkers and had a heck of a time. It’s the longest stint I’ve done in a foreign country (I spent one year in Mexico, two years in France, and two years in the UK) and I’d say that that counts for something.

Why is Hong Kong so great? Well, the benefits of living and working here for any expat are bountiful: the ability to tap into an interesting local culture, amazing travel opportunities at one’s proverbial fingertips, and fabulous professional opportunities that pay handsomely.

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In Sri Lanka last year

The social aspect of living in Hong Kong is also incredible, and probably one of the primary reasons many come and decide to stay. People here are fun and open to trying new things; it seems everyone’s personal motto is YOLO.  Trading business cards or exchanging phone numbers after meeting someone for the first time is the norm, and evenings and weekends out with these newfound friends (who quickly become besties) is an expectation. As such, you will never want for company or things to do here; you will likely receive more invitations (to hikes, boozy brunches, quiz nights, bachelor(ette) parties, random costume parties, dim sum dinners, junks [day-long boat cruises], and more!) than you can accept.  You will spend very little time in your bite-sized Hong Kong apartment, intoxicated by the appeal of what lies beyond your doorstep, and will laugh more than your stomach can handle. You will probably take up a hobby you never would have dreamed of taking up back home, like dragon boating or kite surfing or muay thai; if you’re single and looking you’ll probably date more than you ever have. Hong Kong inspires a lot of personal and professional growth and the connections you make here are powerful. I have been lucky enough to stumble upon a wonderful circle of friends here, which makes it even more difficult to say goodbye.

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Transitions like this are a bit funny because though I’m leaving some place good for a place many would say is even better, I still mourn for what I will leave behind. For, while a new life in New York City trembles with promise, there’s still that dull funereal ache that signals an ending to an epic era– a door closing, the need to move on.

And so, move on I shall, stoically and mostly without regret.  The bags are nearly all packed, the U.S. residency visa is secured, and my Hong Kong income taxes are paid. I fly on Friday night and am already excitedly making plans for Saturday with my adorable husband and besties from my university days who are now based in NYC. I’m not only looking forward to summer days exploring the city’s boroughs but also all the international travel I have planned over the next 3.5 months: I’m off to Panama and Ecuador this month, Barbados and St. Lucia in July, Colombia and Brazil in August, Canada in September, and Bolivia in October.

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Liebling and the rental agent in our new apartment in NYC

Big changes are on the horizon and now all that’s left to do is exhale deeply and catapult myself head-first into what comes next.

I’m ready, but after four wonderful years in a place that has truly become home, I’d be lying if I said that ending this chapter wasn’t bittersweet.

Have you ever experienced any difficult transitions in your life?

SHARING IS CARING

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67 Comments

  • We love you Oneika, and you will be sorely missed.

  • Every transition as a bitter-sweet edge to it. Happy travels to New York and the Americas! Keep the stories coming, we’ll be following your journeys.

  • After living in the U.S for 12 years (I was born in Nigeria, came here for college and stayed afterwards), a job opportunity is taking me to Edinburgh in 2.5 months. This opportunity is exactly what I want, but it is so hard to live in a place (away from home) where I have built a strong community and developed a sense of self.

    Welcome to the USA!

  • Aw…Hong Kong seems like an amazing place just not sure I’d want to live there but seeing your photos at least makes me want to visit. I have one question though: Have you secured a teaching position in NYC yet? I saw the visa pic you posted on Facebook.

  • Hey, girl I have enjoyed seeing HK thru your eyes. I am sure it will be the same for NYC. Take care and go joyfully into that new chapter with your darling. I hope to catch up with you in NYC this summer.

  • Very well written Oneika. New memories are ready to be made in the U.S. Safe travels!

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  • OMG that apartment is HUUUUGE for NYC! Congrats and Best of luck on an exciting new journey! =)

  • I felt like this when I left London after 6 years there. I still miss it but I do feel that it was time for a change. I have been in Sydney for 1 1/2 years and after my year of travels, which I leave for in 4 days (!), I will be back for anoteh 6 months before moving back to my home country of NZ for a couple of years. It is always sad to leave but it is also so exciting to discover new homes

  • I wish you the very best with the move! Hong Kong is an amazing place but I’m sure you will find your niche in NYC as well!

    (P.S. Is that Rondette I see in one of your pictures. I went to junior high with her!!!)

    • I forgot to mention…when I left Shenzhen China after teaching there for 2 years, I could stop crying on my way home. I missed my students dearly and I didn’t know what the next phase of my life would be like. I started graduate school in California shortly thereafter. I was a bit standoffish initially because I was so tired of saying good bye to people. That didn’t last long. I made some amazing friends and my time in China has continued to enrich my life. 🙂

  • Welcome to the US, Oneika and Liebling!!!

    I am looking forward to reading about your summer travels. Barbados is one of my favorite islands so I want hear your take on the island.

    • Thank you!!!!! We’re going to be there for Cropover, can’t wait to jammmmmmmm!

  • I’m so sorry that you had to leave Hong Kong. Again LOL! But I agree with you 100%. I was only in Hong Kong for a month a few years after the British handover…and I simply had the best time ever. And you’re right, the people there are amazing. I lived in a whirlwind of parties and social outings galore and I wasn’t even living there LOL!

    Have I ever experienced any difficult transitions in my life? Sure! I used to live in Prague and Bratislava. I lived there for 2 years and at the time, it was amazing. I had a fantastic group of Czech friends who were all artists (just the type of people that I like) and I was part of the inner circle and doors opened pretty much everywhere I went. After 2 years, I went back to the UK but I couldn’t really settle down even though I was living a fabulous life in London at the time LOL. Prague couldn’t afford to keep me in the style of which I had become accustomed, so 1.5 years later I moved to Berlin and I never looked back!

    • Cool! Had no idea that you were also a serial expat, Victoria! Did you learn any Czech at all? Also, I’ve always wondered, how’s your Deutsch? Liebling and I would like to move back to Berlin at some point but I always wonder if I would be able to become proficient in German– it’s so easy to get around speaking English in Berlin!

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